How much does it cost to PLACE your baby for adoption?
#1: Baby Boy due April 8, 2010! asked:
I’m 21 weeks and 4 days pregnant with a baby boy. I’m 19 years old and am weighing out my options: parenting or adoption.
Personally, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get over placing my son up for adoption, but I’m looking into it.
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I’m 21 weeks and 4 days pregnant with a baby boy. I’m 19 years old and am weighing out my options: parenting or adoption.
Personally, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get over placing my son up for adoption, but I’m looking into it.
How much does it cost to place your baby up for adoption through an agency?
How much does placing your baby cost…in total?
Thanks to all and please to rude or criticizing remarks. I have not decided yet. I appreciate your kindness.
November 30th, 2009 at 7:08 pm
0$…but a life time of wondering “what if”…if that’s still free for you…I wouldn’t unless it was someone that was in my family and my child would still know me. Due 7-12-10
December 4th, 2009 at 1:23 am
Adoptions are free……..it’s like what if you were to be deceased or something. That kid would be an orphan/adopt kid. wadafruit
December 4th, 2009 at 12:40 pm
If you really want to place your child for adoption you should call an agency. They can help you decide which kind of adoption would fit you best. I believe that it wouldn’t cost you anything. Usually the cost is covered by the adopting parents, sometimes even your medical bills concerning the pregnancy. There are plenty of agencies available to help you if you decide to keep your child too. Medicaid for medical, assistance for child care, and even some schools for you to improve your future. Look into all your options before doing something you may regret. Good luck with whatever decision you make. Susan
December 6th, 2009 at 9:50 pm
do whatever you feel is right for you. if thats adoption then go for it. Alyse
December 8th, 2009 at 1:50 am
Zero cash, but a lifetime of pain, heartache, and worry for both you AND your child. Please do some reading on here or even ask some questions of adult adoptees and how they feel now/felt as children. There are plenty of ways for you to support your child if you really want to. You can get WIC, food stamps, HUD (for housing), etc. Don’t know how to locate help? ASK. There are people who can help you with your finances so that you can support yourself and your child.
Do this: wait until your child is born to decide whether or not you want to relinquish. After you have your baby, hold him, smell him, nurse him. Change his diaper. Let him sleep in the isolette next to your bed. If you still want to relinquish, there will be plenty of people lined up to adopt your baby. If you choose an adoptive couple before your child is even born, you will be bombarded with gifts and talk of how selfless you are. You’ll be treated like a queen. What’s wrong with that? Nothing…except that it ends the MINUTE your child is in the adoptive couple’s arms. If you tell them you’re thinking about changing your mind, you’ll be called selfish and maybe even a whore. (Excuse me? Selfish for wanting to keep your own child? I don’t think so!) You’ll be told that you PROMISED Mr. and Mrs. X this baby and that you’re breaking their hearts. You may even be told that it’s too late to keep your baby; a promise is a promise and it’s legally binding (that’s bullsh!t). You’ll be told that Mr. and Mrs. X can give your baby this and that and you can’t. (Too bad. The baby wants his MOTHER, not a pony or a swimming pool or a private school education.)
Make your decision after you’re FULLY informed and don’t decide ANYTHING until after your baby is born. aloha.girl59
December 10th, 2009 at 1:07 am
Adoption is a loving answer, especially nowadays when open adoptions - - where you’re part of the child’s life - - exist. People love to tell horror stories, but keep in mind that most of the people who tell them haven’t placed their babies for adoption.
Try for information on placing your baby. You can read about it without obligation. Adoption isn’t what it used to be where you never see your child again, it’s a good way to give your baby the best. I don’t work for any adoption agency, but I believe in adoption. LR R
December 12th, 2009 at 5:22 pm
It would not cost you a thing financially. I went through with an adoption with my first born and still have great contact with him and the parents. I contacted an agency called Mother Goose Adoptions. Everyone who works for the agency is either a birth mother, adoptive mother, or an adopted child themselves, so they can answer any kind of question you throw at them. I honestly didn’t think I would be able to do it, and I won’t lie it does hurt, but if you’re unsure about you’re parenting abilities, it’s good that you’re looking in to it. My son is 4 and a half years old now. He’s absolutely beautiful, healthy, and I couldn’t be happier with the decision I made for him. Yes it hurts, and it’s always going to hurt, but the fact is I believe I made the best decision for both of us. BlAcK_WiDoW
December 15th, 2009 at 7:55 pm
Its completely free thats how we protect inocent children from being neglected if someones not ready they simply give away this way the child is tooken care of if thy charged for adoptions then our children being killed would be so much higher because of parents not able to pay Proud Mommy
December 18th, 2009 at 1:21 am
Infertile adoptive couples will fall on their knees and prostrate themselves at your feet with cash in hand to beg for your baby. It will cost you zero dollars. The real cost will be a lifetime of grief over the loss of your child.
Please read this wonderful brochure written by a mother who lost her child to adoption and grieves every day for her loss:
Heather Lowe’s “What you should KNOW if you’re considering adoption for your baby”
Your son has one and only one true mother - you. grapesgum
December 20th, 2009 at 7:26 am
All it will cost you is what it cost me. Years of pain, sorrow, grief and longing. Today marked my son’s 15th birthday… Do you want to be me in 15 years, celebrating your child’s birthday alone, longing for that “open” adoption you were promised? I baked a cake… a huge, beautiful cake, then I threw it away because I can’t eat his cake without him but I can’t not bake a cake for him any more than I could not bake a cake for his “kept” sisters.
ETA
I always love how people feel they can talk for me.
YES losing my son cost me my soul. Unless you have walked in these shoes you have NO clue what it cost me to lose my firstborn child. Go give away your child and tell me it cost you nothing. Ignorant, just ignorant.
So no, it won’t cost you money, it will only cost you your soul. Good luck with that. Andraya searchin for Jay11/29/94
December 21st, 2009 at 4:14 am
your soul is all it costs. If you think now that you will not get over it then you won’t. Your son won’t either. You already have shown you want to parent him so stop with the adoption nonsense. Do not contact any agencies. Once you talk to them they will not take no for an answer. Just enjoy your pregnancy and when April comes around enjoy your son. Aislin
December 24th, 2009 at 5:28 am
Last time I checked, it was free for the birth mother. I think it’s rude for everyone to tell you you’re selfish if you don’t keep the baby. Giving it to what you think will be a better parent/s is just as brave and deciding to keep it. Just definitely meet the prospective parents and make sure it feels right. Good luck, whatever you choose!! I was 20 when I got pregnant and didn’t think I could do it but I grew into a person that could by the time I had the baby. =) Camilleta
December 24th, 2009 at 7:14 am
Try not to be scared by all the people “answering your question” on here…about how it costs you your soul if you give your baby up. Not true! If you have to give him up, that’s not costing you your soul, you are being loving and giving your baby a better life than you could maybe give him. Think about your options, see a therapist, but don’t let ANYONE put you down for YOUR decision. ballerinakiki
December 25th, 2009 at 4:11 am
In money terms nothing but in emotional terms it is priceless. It’s your choice at the end of the day but I would encourage you to parent over surrendering. Pip
December 27th, 2009 at 10:47 am
It doesn’t cost anything financially.
However…. my brother and I are adopted, and even with all this “open” adoption stuff, we still have no idea where we come from. I have no real sense of family even though my adoptive parents love us, and always feel awkward filling out family medical history stuff because I honestly have no idea.
The reason my mom adopted us is because she had a baby at 19 and put him up for adoption. 40 years later she still hasn’t found him, and it hurts her a lot. She was never able to get pregnant with my father, so the loss of her only natural child has been haunting her for 40 years. It really affected our whole family.
As an adoptee, I plan on adopting a child once I’m married. But if I get pregnant, I’m definitely keeping my baby. It’s really hard to not know your real mother. If you haven’t been through it, you don’t know. hiryuu_hime
December 30th, 2009 at 9:11 am
Hi there…
It will cost you a piece of yourself that you can never get back regardless of how often you see him or if you reunite with him if you place him for adoption. To me that is priceless, and not for sale… so it costs the earth. In a paper monetary sense, it costs nothing…but it depends on what you consider more important in life I guess. Agencies are good at promising you the world but they lie and do not keep their promises.
I hope you end up parenting your son. All the best through what must be a difficult time… (I assume as you are looking into adoption). Always know that difficult times come and go whatever stage of life you are in… but the pain of losing one’s child will stay forever.
Good luck and email me if you want more info. myst1998
January 1st, 2010 at 11:06 pm
It doesn’t cost you any money. *Starfire*