I have a 6 month old baby, I am interested in placing her for adoption?


baby adoption
Someone asked:


I am interested in placing my baby for adoption, but my “hubby” has a name on the birth certificate. I don’t think he is really the father and I don’t want him to fight me placing her. He is an alcoholic and he is extremely abusive. I don’t want her in the wrong hands. Is it possible to have his name taken off the birth certificate, he hardly did anything when she was born anyway. He’s a lazy fucker.

This entry was posted on Monday, July 5th, 2010 at 12:00 am and is filed under Adoption. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

14 Responses to “I have a 6 month old baby, I am interested in placing her for adoption?”

  1. Tuxicans Says:

    You’ll need to contact an attorney to find out if he can be removed from the birth certificate. As long as his name is on it, he has to sign away his parental rights, as far as I know. Tuxicans

  2. Opedial Says:

    I will adopt your baby. Please send info to:

    But if this is a real situation, get to a women’s shelter pronto and keep your baby. Opedial

  3. DevonChaos Says:

    You will need to have your husband sign away his rights. He doesn’t have to though. You may think badly of him, but it is up to the courts to decide if he’d be a fit parent or not. He has the right to raise the baby, even if you decide to quit parenting your daughter. DevonChaos

  4. Mom to Foster Children Says:

    Opedial - lmao -

    you crack me up!

    to answer the question - why would you not just leave “the hubby”…father or not! Mom to Foster Children

  5. Cleopatra Says:

    You’re experiencing a “moment” - go have a nap instead. Cleopatra

  6. Lawyer Says:

    Have a DNA test done. There are home kits you can order on-line. You will need to swab the inside of your child’s cheek, as well as yours and your hubby’s. The directions are in the kit. Then you mail the swabs with the payment and the lab will send you the results. After that it may be easier to have hubby take his name off the birth certificate. If he thinks you want that, he may fight it to be obstinate, but as the father on the BC, he is obligated to pay child support. That may make him more agreeable to having it removed. If the DNA test shows he is not the father, then he may be agreeable to signing the papers to place the child for adoption. Once the child is adopted, he will no longer be financially responsible. I suggest that you talk to an atty in your state who specializes in adoption or go to your local legal aid (legal services) office if you are of low income. Lawyer

  7. just live your life. Says:

    no the only way you can get his name off the birth certificate is to get paternity test & prove who is the father. then that father has the right to either put his name on certifcate or not.

    the second way is for him to sign up his rights to the child.

    end of story.
    why would you want to put your child up for adoption after 6 mo?
    make sure this is exactly what you want to do. you don’t want to be messing with other’s feelings.

    how is the rest of your family going to react? just live your life.

  8. Ferbs Says:

    If you’re really married, he likely is considered the legal father.

    Why not leave his lazy butt and get financial assistance? There is no shame in that.

    Don’t be surprised if he gets visitation though. See an attorney ASAP. Ferbs

  9. Pearl L Says:

    talk to social services about it Pearl L

  10. tigger Says:

    Why on earth do you want to abandon (a.k.a. get rid of) your baby? This sounds incredibly heartless. Don’t you love her any more? tigger

  11. *me* Says:

    awww :0( Ill take her…you need to contact an attorney! *me*

  12. 7rin Says:

    So ditch him instead of the kid - otherwise you’ll end up much worse than as just a lazy fucker, and likely, so will your kid.

    DO NOT ABANDON YOUR CHILD TO ADOPTION!

    Seriously.

    Also, don’t listen to anyone suggesting that open adoption is the way to go - it is almost never legally enforceable! Many parents have lost access to their children due to “open” adoption promises. Please read and and before listening to the hype.

    I was abandoned to adoption at 7mths old. I didn’t have a bad adoption - my afamily are the best I could ever have chosen… but if I’d been able to choose, and I’d known then what I know now, I’d've chosen to be aborted before birth instead, ’cause at least that way the lifetime of agony I’ve gone through would’ve been over in minutes, instead of the decades that I’ve been suffering for now.

    I’ve been in reunion with my bfam for a few months now, and even that’s proving to be completely agonising.

    Taken from Nancy Verrier’s book, Coming Home to Self:

    For the adoptee every day is a challenge of trying to figure out how to be, although he probably doesn’t understand the difficulty this presents for him. It has been true his whole life and, therefore, feels normal. However, it takes a great deal of energy and concentration. And it never feels quite right. He never quite fits. Therefore he feels as if /he/ is never quite right.
    (pg 50)

    Abandonment and neglect are reported to be the two most devastating experiences that children endure - even more devastating then sexual or physical abuse. That’s why some neglected children do naughty things to get attention. Even though the attention is hurtful - being yelled at, hit, or otherwise harmed - it is better than neglect. /Anything/ is better than abandonment. Abandonment is a child’s greatest fear. For adoptees, it is also reality, embedded in their implicit and unintegrated memory.
    (pg 102)

    It is sometimes difficult to spot grief in children. After all, it isn’t as if the child sits in a puddle of tears his entire childhood. As one adoptee said, “Of course I played, laughed, sang. Do people think that if you’re not sitting in a corner with your head on your knees, you are not sad? I had happy times, but the sadness was always there, even when I was having fun.”
    (pg 117) 7rin

  13. kays Says:

    WOW!!!sounds like a lmn movie if u really love ur man more u wouldnt call him a lazy ass so idk becuz if u loved ur daughter ud never even think of that u would leave him.. but there are lots of ppl who try to have kids and cant and would love her and treat her right so u should talk to a lawyer and get her into a better home kays

  14. jm1970 Says:

    Even if he is not the biological father if he is your legal husband he is legally the child’s father regardless of DNA. jm1970

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