Is it racist for a couple to stop adoption proceedings if the baby born is black?
ghostwriter asked:
Good friends of ours have a daughter who is unable to have children and her and her husband started applying to adoption agencies.
They specified that they wanted an infant who was white and from a drug-free and healthy birth mother and were approved.
They met the young pregnant girl and befriended her and became quite active in helping her both emotionally and financially through her pregnancy.
This young woman knew the couple’s requirements for adopting her baby and she swore that her baby’s father was a white man.
The adoptive parents prepared their home for the arrival of the baby and the family even threw her a shower.
They were very excited and overjoyed at finally being able to adopt a baby.
Our friends flew to Iowa to join their daughter and son-in-law in witnessing the birth of the baby, but the infant was black so they refused to take the baby and canceled the adoption.
They were heartbroken and have since given up on adoption.
Do you think they are racists?
Just curious.
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Good friends of ours have a daughter who is unable to have children and her and her husband started applying to adoption agencies.
They specified that they wanted an infant who was white and from a drug-free and healthy birth mother and were approved.
They met the young pregnant girl and befriended her and became quite active in helping her both emotionally and financially through her pregnancy.
This young woman knew the couple’s requirements for adopting her baby and she swore that her baby’s father was a white man.
The adoptive parents prepared their home for the arrival of the baby and the family even threw her a shower.
They were very excited and overjoyed at finally being able to adopt a baby.
Our friends flew to Iowa to join their daughter and son-in-law in witnessing the birth of the baby, but the infant was black so they refused to take the baby and canceled the adoption.
They were heartbroken and have since given up on adoption.
Do you think they are racists?
Just curious.
April 16th, 2009 at 6:45 pm
No, because I think that a black child (especially) since we encounter the most racism shouldn’t be raised by a race of people we encounter it from. That white person may not be racist it is just hard for whites to teach a black person about their identity (relate to their troubles) unless they themselves are black. I think it is in the best interest of the child.
April 18th, 2009 at 3:35 am
Sounds kinda racist, and kinda sad. But it’s better that they didn’t adopt the child if they don’t think they would have been able to care for it and love it properly, for whatever reason. I’m not sure why they would give up on adoption because of that, though. Having an interracial child could probably be difficult for some people to handle and maybe they just didn’t want to deal with all the questions and they didn’t want it to be so obvious that they adopted. I really hope that child found a good home.
April 20th, 2009 at 4:19 am
They are not racist. They made it specifically clear on what they wanted and were looking for. No where in the clause did it say ” doesn’t matter, we will take whatever”. This was not a racist act at all. There are things that you have to prepare yourself for when a baby is bi-racial ( regardless of what biracial people say) If the baby was Asian, it would apply the same. You have to be prepared to teach that child its heritage and culture. I would not want to have that job if I was not prepared to deal with it. People are not always prepared to deal with a million questions on a child not looking like you.
April 20th, 2009 at 5:56 pm
No. Considering they are taking in a child and will raise it until adulthood, I think that they have every right to choose the characteristics of the baby.
I’m assuming that these two people are white. Having a white child will make it more like the baby is really theirs and there won’t be a constant visual reminder that this child is adopted (skin colour). And the constant reminder that this child is clearly not of their blood-line might be a sore subject since the two people in question were unable to concieve.
April 23rd, 2009 at 11:31 pm
It amuses me how readily available that word is. In lieu of the word racist why not use the word wrong. Is it a moral dilemma? Were they more upset that the child was black or that the mother of the child lied to them? It is their very own personal choice to accept or not accept ANY child for whatever reason. I certainly wish the very best for the child.
April 24th, 2009 at 11:42 pm
Wow, that is a shame. Tell them we’d love to take the baby.