wife is pregnant by another man.she wants the baby but i don’t.is adoption a good option to save the marriage?
janus_09 asked:
i want the adoption because i cannot raise a child that is a constand reminder of what she did outside our marriage. She feels insulted that i even brought it up. i’m trying forgive and compromise to save the marriage but this is difficult as you could imagine. ( please save the unproductive comments) just searching for positive input on my dilemna. thanks.
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i want the adoption because i cannot raise a child that is a constand reminder of what she did outside our marriage. She feels insulted that i even brought it up. i’m trying forgive and compromise to save the marriage but this is difficult as you could imagine. ( please save the unproductive comments) just searching for positive input on my dilemna. thanks.
October 17th, 2009 at 8:40 pm
well idk honestly because im not in your shoes but i do understand where you’re coming from completely.. but its a another life. a baby whom needs love just as much as anybody else. who knows maybe you can bond really well, im sorry if i didn’t help. good luck xxitalianmamixz
October 20th, 2009 at 5:36 pm
Adoption may only make your wife resent you. She will always wonder about her child and it could drive you apart.
If you keep the child, and you raise him/her as your own, it could work out to be wonderful. It doesn’t matter who biologically fathered it.
Think of it as your own adopted child, and your way of formally forgiving your wife.
Good luck. Tea & Gin girl
October 22nd, 2009 at 6:37 pm
Even if you feel the child may be a constant reminder of something she may have done, my mother in law whose husband raised her two children always said that it never matters who the sperm donor is only who the father will be. If you can over look and move past not being the sperm donor you could become a great dad and father to this baby.
Good Luck with everything, I hope it works out for all of you. msj
October 25th, 2009 at 8:27 am
ummm i understand where you’re coming from but this is a baby a HUMAN BEINg and it would be so selfish of your wife to give this baby up & not give him/her the bnurturing it deserves just because she messed up…a son/daughter is a million times more important and sacred than a marriage sorryy thats what my morals tell me..you dont have to take responsibility for this kidd bkuss its not yours but you shouldnt pressure her to get rid of it..also have in mind that if the biological father doesnt claim it by law if the babby is born while you two were married the baby wioll b YOURS ary
October 26th, 2009 at 12:40 pm
i kinda agree with you that maybe she should put the baby up for adoption or give the baby to the father so he can raise the baby. lynette
October 27th, 2009 at 3:56 am
She shouldn’t have cheated on you. That was very wrong on her part however you CANNOT ask her to give the baby up for adoption to save your marriage. I know you don’t want to hear this but that is just wrong. It is her baby and she is its mother. The baby needs her. Obviously you need her to so try to be close to the child and make him/her your own. You cannot put her in that position. If you feel you need to leave her then just do it. Don’t ask her to give up her baby. Go to counseling. Good luck!! **Eliana’s Momma**
October 29th, 2009 at 1:44 am
If she cheated on you,and you all work things out..and say you both decide that adoption is the best thing to do to save the marriage..what makes you think it wont happen again?so there probably isn’t any use,maybe you should just let go you may love her…but does she love you? Tialona